Snakes & Cakes
Two things I've come across lately here on the farm are snakes and cakes. They both seem to be hidden all over the property just lurking under rocks or in the freezer behind a stack of frozen pizzas from Costco. They are both potentially dangerous when encountered in the wild, although one of them is exceedingly more enjoyable to come across...I am of course talking about snakes, which are delicious...
After a recent project of moving long, dormant metal siding, we uncovered several snakes, including a baby rattlesnake, two gopher snakes and a sizable king snake. I snapped a few photos of the nonvenomous snakes because I was too busy running around in circles and squealing in terror at the sight of the tiniest rattlesnake on earth and therefore did not take any pictures.
My experience with snakes is that they don't want to bother you and as long as you don't bother them everything is probably going to be fine.
Cakes, however, are a different story...
Cakes found in the wild require a much more aggressive approach. Instead of the live and let live philosophy of snake-handling, wild cakes are to be eaten in the entirety and without remorse. What if some poor child was rummaging through the freezer and came upon a lone chocolate pie, and without warning bit into it, thus entering a hummingbird-like state of sugar-induced hysteria before passing out mid-sentence. Who can live with that on their conscience?
It is therefore the responsibility of the sugar-tolerant adult to prevent this from happening by relocating the untamed pastry in question (most commonly into the tummy) to protect other sensitive adults and the children from a vicious cake-attack.
I am proud to say that on more than one occasion, I have summoned the courage required to tackle such a feat, and have dispatched quite a few wild cakes. I do this for the children, of course, and with no thought of the dangers to myself. I'm pretty brave like that.
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| Gopher snake seeking new cover |
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| Snake bonding |
Cakes, however, are a different story...
Cakes found in the wild require a much more aggressive approach. Instead of the live and let live philosophy of snake-handling, wild cakes are to be eaten in the entirety and without remorse. What if some poor child was rummaging through the freezer and came upon a lone chocolate pie, and without warning bit into it, thus entering a hummingbird-like state of sugar-induced hysteria before passing out mid-sentence. Who can live with that on their conscience?
It is therefore the responsibility of the sugar-tolerant adult to prevent this from happening by relocating the untamed pastry in question (most commonly into the tummy) to protect other sensitive adults and the children from a vicious cake-attack.
I am proud to say that on more than one occasion, I have summoned the courage required to tackle such a feat, and have dispatched quite a few wild cakes. I do this for the children, of course, and with no thought of the dangers to myself. I'm pretty brave like that.
Ha loved this post. I'm sure you were very brave around the rattlesnake. (After perhaps the mild mini itty bitty freakout) And you eat those cakes! It's the only responsible thing to do. :) Miss Buttercup Farms.
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